“Unsettling” Thanksgiving: Talking about colonialism with your child
Nov 24, 2020
For many families around the United States, the fourth Thursday in November brings up feelings of warmth, joy, full bellies, and family. Children color hand-turkeys in class, reflect on what they’re thankful for, and learn about the Mayflower and pilgrims.
Thanksgiving is a holiday that goes by other names, however, as this day does not carry the same connotation for Indigenous people in the United States. In New England, many Indigenous people refer to Thanksgiving as the National Day of Mourning; on the West Coast, Unthanksgiving. A quick google search will suffice if you happen to be unaware of the injustice, displacement, and violence Indigenous people have endured since the arrival of British colonists in the 1600s to present day.
The history taught in US public schools merely grazes over what really happened on Thanksgiving, perpetuating a narrative that does not center the experience of Indigenous people. The erasure of Indigenous voices is pervasive in US history and all aspects of society today; continuing to teach children about Thanksgiving in a white-washed way contributes to this injustice.
As beneficiaries of colonization, it is especially important for people who are white and of non-Indigenous heritage to do the work of “unsettling” the United States - returning land back to Indigenous people by looking to Indigenous leadership and uplifting Indigenous voices, as well as meeting rightful demands of reparations for the centuries of hardship caused by colonization.
If you already had an awareness of what I just discussed and are committed to teaching your children an unbiased version of US history, you might be wondering - how can I approach this topic in a developmentally appropriate way with my child? The majority of children at Amherst Montessori School are toddler and preschool aged; is there a way we can be honest and vulnerable about our place as colonizers, while also respecting what information our children can process?
Below, I’ve outlined a few ideas on how to approach this subject not just around Thanksgiving time, but all year round:
- Educate yourself! Did you know that UMASS Amherst is among many higher education institutions in the United States known as a land grant universities, whose inception depended on the forced seizure of Indigenous land? Did you know that there are still Water Protectors facing criminal prosecution to this day for defending their land against the Dakota Access Pipeline? It’s important to set aside time in our busy lives to educate ourselves about struggles Indigenous people face that are not broadcasted on mainstream news. The more information you have, the easier it will be to digest and present to your children if they have any questions - and, if you don't know the answer, Google it!
- Read books by Indigenous people that center Indigenous characters and stories with your children often. Children love to read, and are in what is in Montessori pedagogy called their “absorbent mind” phase of development from birth to age 6. Having a diverse array of books with characters of many different identities is beneficial to children’s development; even just looking at pictures is extremely important and meaningful if a child isn’t at reading level yet. Fortunately, there are plenty of children’s books by Indigenous authors that span all different reading levels - from board books to chapter books.
You can view our Inclusive Book Drive blog post to see AMS’s wishlist for books, many of which are by Indigenous authors. Additionally, many lists have been compiled online - like this list here by The Conscious Kid and this list by the Seattle Public Library - it just takes a bit of Googling to find them. Read books that center Indigenous characters and stories regularly with your children, among other stories centering various cultures and identities. Have them in an accessible place for children to leaf through and look at during reading and playtime.
A note I’d like to make about this topic is that to go deeper into preserving Indigenous voices and narratives, do some research on the authors. There are many children's books that are written by people who are not of Indigenous heritage that tell Indigenous folk stories, while there are so many books that are by Indigenous authors that provide the same riveting stories, beautiful illustrations, and meaningful content. It doesn’t make sense to read a story written by an author who, by virtue of their identity and privilege, benefits from settler colonialism when Indigenous voices are already present in the children’s book industry.
- Start a conversation. On Thanksgiving this year, take time to chat with your child about what they know about Indigenous culture. In our Elementary classroom during Indigenous People’s Day, Krystal, the Elementary Lead, put a journal prompt on the board, asking students to think about what the land Amherst Montessori School occupies may have looked like thousands of years ago. Who would have been working and living on the land? Would the same buildings, same identities of people be thriving here?
Long before settlers invaded North America, land and territory was parsed out in a very different way. It might be a good activity to check out a Native Land map and learn more about the Indigenous groups whose land it really belongs to. If your child is older, have them engage in the research; if not, do research and share it with your younger child, including many pictures to look at.
Children in Sassafras recently looked at a map of Native American Tribal Nations created by a Native American cartographer after reading We Are Grateful: Otsaliheliga by Traci Sorell. The map shows the original settlements of the Native American tribes and most of the Tribal names shown are the proper names used by Native Americans in their own languages. To combat the erasure of Indigenous voices and history, keep these conversations going with your child year round, especially as you yourself learn more and more.
- Start a new tradition. It is important to note that we can hold these complex truths while still being grateful for the time we get to spend with our loved ones in November. While honoring the traditions your family already has in place for the holiday season, I encourage you to make new memories with your children by teaching them the power of social justice work.
If you are in a position to do so, one simple way to utilize your privilege to benefit people of marginalized identities is redistribution of wealth. The unfortunate reality of living in a society structured around capitalism is that capital is the primary means of access to opportunity, food, shelter, and more.
Consider starting a tradition of giving to a local Indigenous community. Most of the AMS community live in the Amherst area and beyond - we are occupying ancestral Nipmuc land. If your children are old enough to earn an allowance, ask them to help you make a donation to the Nipmuc Nation.
Additionally, year round, be on the lookout for various GoFundMes or even local organizations that your family would like to give a periodic gift to. Decide a realistic amount of money you’re able to give on a regular basis - I usually set aside around $20 per paycheck to redistribute to various funds and initiatives happening in my community. Starting this tradition early, even just talking about it with your children, will plant the seed of utilizing their privilege to help meet the needs and asks of their community members.
If money isn’t an option, you can give your time and labor as well - plug in to a local organization that maybe delivers meals to people; make calls to local officials in support of legislation that will create access for marginalized communities; watch the National Day of Mourning live stream on November 26th with your family, and support organizations that uplift Indigenous voices. The fight for Indigenous rights and land reparations is one that benefits all of us, so all efforts are intertwined.
Thank you so much for reading this post and reflecting on Thanksgiving/National Day of Mourning. The sentiment I want to you to take away from this post is that it is so important to have these conversations year round! Recognizing the rich but systemically repressed history and culture of Indigenous people, as told by Indigenous voices, is such an important step towards collective wellbeing and liberation for all people. As a school community, we have so much power in shaping the next generation of activists working towards peace and unity.
Have an amazing break, and I’d like to leave you with this quote by Dr. Montessori: “Culture and education have no bounds or limits; now man is in a phase in which he must decide for himself how far he can proceed in the culture that belongs to the whole of humanity.”
Jessica Hesse
Advancement Assistant